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My roommate sent the following email to me and my friend, Jafo, yesterday.

I read online someone took their beta fish to the vet. I also saw where they’re asking the most humane way to kill a fish that’s sick. Am I cruel and heartless in that I’d look to the toilet for both situations? Am I not fit to be a fish owner?

Before I had read it, Jafo had replied with:

Wide open door for us to stroll through here in terms of what kind of things you aren’t fit to own. Just a gaping hole for us to stream foul, evil comments through. Thanks for that.

As far as fish go, for most of your generic aquarium fish, if that stuff that pet stores have that you squeeze into their tanks when they are stressed doesn’t work, the toilet is effective. For actually wanting to kill one, they could freeze it. Or do what one of my roommates did with one of his – chuck it in a plastic shopping bag and slam it into a wall and the ground.

Shit. I can’t top that.

Sometimes it’s better to just watch things unfold.

  • Wait a minute — someone took a fish to the vet? A fucking fish???

    Who are these people with all the disposable fucking income for shit like this? If they write me a check, I’ll kill the fish for them, and then nicely explain that he’s now in Fish Heaven.

    Having said that, I’m rather shocked that FM was both cruel and heartless about the suffering of this beta fish. I mean, what’s next, flushing cats down the toilet? Biting heads off of kittens?

    I’m thinking that either you hacked into her email and sent that email yourself, or clearly, anyone who’s your roommate long enough also becomes evil and heartless.

    I’m just saying.

  • Instead of being mad, I’m kind of flattered that you would think I make others evil and heartless.

    Kind of makes me feel like I’m gathering the troops.

    *sigh*

  • You know, it never occured to me that you’d get mad. Not even a possibility. Now how did I know that? Oh right — Bizarro World.

    Yes, gathering the troops. We are gaining in number…

  • Ace

    Me, I’d vote for buying a bigger fish. That’ll cure the little fish’s ills, and make the big fish nice and full.

  • Lesley – I have a fish, but don’t care about it. It’s something to do, not something I like. Kind of the same way I feel about my cats, only I’m guilted into caring for them because they let me pet them and they act like they love me.

  • My wife bought 2 rats last month for $4. I told her that no matter what, if anything happened to them, they were going to the dumpster, not the vet. She had to think about it a minute before agreeing.

  • lol

    I agree with you. No need wasting hundreds dollars on a vet bill when you can pick up a new buddy for 2 bucks.

  • WaltDe

    Very good reading. Peace until next time.
    WaltDe