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Recently I just finished using crest white strips on my teeth. I’m a smoker and a coffee drinker and it was starting to show.

Holy hell, what a difference those strips made.

But, that’s not really what this entry is about.

I told my sister about the wonders of the white strips (her being a smoker and coffee drinker as well). She agreed that they did work wonders.

She went on to tell me why she had picked them up.

One day a few years back, her and Cody, my nephew, were driving down the street and playing “I spy” (or is it “Eye spy?”).

My sister said, “I spy with my little eye something red.”

“The stop sign!” Cody exclaimed.

“That’s good, honey.” My sister drove on and saw something else.

“I spy with my little eye something yellow.” She said.

Cody looked out the window a bit, searching for the yellow something.

Finally, he turned to my sister, smiled, pointed at her mouth and said, “Mama’s teeth!”

She finished the story by telling me she stopped and picked up some white strips.

I laughed my ass off.

  • OH COOL!! So they really work, eh? I was wondering. I didn’t want to spend the $40 to find out that they didn’t work. I had a dental hygenist tell me to use Crest Strips and Rembrandt toothpaste..

    I’ve had off-white colored teeth my whole life. The dentist told me that teeth aren’t really white. I think he was just trying to make me feel better!

    Norman- who will go buy the strips now!

    Thanks for the consumer review!

  • Yeah, much easier to buy white strips rather than just…hmmm, let’s see…STOP SMOKING YOU FREAKIN’ ASHTRAY!
    This has been a message from the “WE WISH OUR CLOTHES DIDN’T SMELL LIKE SMOKE BECAUSE OF YOU” association of American.
    🙂

  • White strips? You give me teh ghey.

    What’s next? Waxing your eyebrows? Manicure/pedicure? A little foundation and blush?

    I’m just asking.

  • Ace

    My teeth have always been kind of off-white (like the rest of me) and I don’t know about the strips, but those whitening toothpastes (teethpaste?) don’t do anything about it.

    And Norman, the dentist told me the same thing, my teeth just aren’t white (like the rest of me). I guess it happens.

  • Norman said:
    I’ve had off-white colored teeth my whole life. The dentist told me that teeth aren’t really white. I think he was just trying to make me feel better!

    Ace said:
    And Norman, the dentist told me the same thing, my teeth just aren’t white (like the rest of me). I guess it happens.

    A few years ago I had to have dental reconstruction due to a health problem. My dentist said that teeth should not be white, they are supposed to be yellowish. That’s because enamel (which your teeth should have plenty of) is yellowish. He said the only time teeth are white is when all of the enamel has been stripped off of them, which of course means they are unhealthy.

    Next time you go to the dentist, ask to see the teeth color chart they use for making fake teeth and doing repairs. None will be even close to white.

    When you see people on TV with totally white teeth, it’s because they have been capped. There’s no way a tooth can naturally be that white, unless like mentioned above, it’s been stripped of all the enamel.

    Enjoy your unhealthy white teeth, suckers!

  • I would comment back to all of you, but the gleam from white teeth are reflecting off the monitor, so I can’t see who said what. 🙁

  • Heh – different shades of lipstick will draw out or mask the yellowness of your teeth…

  • Thanks for the tip! I did not know that.

    I shall check to see what shades I have lying around and do some testing.

  • Oh God. That was priceless.