Yesterday my buddy Kevin calls me up and asks me if I want to go location scouting with him and his brother for a new story he’s prepping for his anthology feature. I immediately said yes, mainly because it was right down the street from me (literally, like a mile away) and I always have fun hanging out with those guys.

However, even though I did meet up with briefly, something unexpected came up and I had to leave them to their own devices, traversing through the woods and general other riffraff.

Sometime later, I had all but settled in for the evening and was about 20 minutes into the horror film Wrong Turn when my phone rang. It was Kevin, letting me know they had finished up and asking me if I wanted to come over his brother’s house and watch the movie Matinee. I of course said sure, what the hell. I’d never seen the movie, and even if I had, since his brother lives even closer than where they were scouting, it wasn’t like I was driving across town.

“When are you guys going to be there?” I asked.

“Well, we’re going to stop and get pizza first. As soon as we get out of the woods.”

“You aren’t out of the woods yet? It’s dark. Do you have flashlights?”

“We have headlamps.”

“Do you know where you are?”

“Not exactly. I gotta go. We have to figure out how to get out of here.”

I laughed as I hung up. Then I stopped because I was watching Wrong Turn. Then I laughed again at the irony.

Time went by, and just as I was about to call Kevin back to see if I needed to call the National Guard, my phone rang (which was eerie because I was literally-not-figuratively reaching for it to call him when it rang). The two had made it safely out of the woods.

That’s cool My pals didn’t die at the hands of some inbred hillbillies.

And Matinee was pretty good.

  • I can’t die. It’s a curse. So I wasn’t sweating it. My luck, we’d just get lost and end up spending an uncomfortably-cold night in the woods with no food or drink.