Warning: in_array() expects parameter 2 to be array, string given in /home/content/A/l/i/AlienRedrum/html/blog/wp-content/plugins/wordpress-mobile-pack/frontend/sections/show-rel.php on line 37

Dear Guy In Wawa That Was Giving Me The Dirty Look Tonight,

That stupid grin on my face was not me smiling at you.  Well, it was, but not in the way you think.  It was in the “laughing at you, not with you” way.  Don’t get your manhood up in a bunch, I wasn’t hitting on you.  I was trying to contain the laughter that was threatening to leave my lips.

See, it wasn’t the black trench coat.   Or the black jeans.  Or the black shirt.  While that in itself is amusing, it wasn’t the reason why I was smiling. 

And it wasn’t the mullet you were sporting — although I particularly liked the crew cut mullet.  Class AND style, there, brother.

It was the fact that you were still proudly wearing your high school ring.

Now don’t get me wrong, I do realize a lot of people wear their class rings.  And that’s cool.  But, damn, man, you are like 35.  It’s time to let go.

So when you add all of those things up, you have to expect people are going to smile.  I know you are a walking party animal, the Spuds McKenzie poster you no doubt have on your bedroom wall proves it.  But, brother, it’s not 1987 anymore as much as some of us wish it were.

But, even if it were 1987, the mullet is still not in style.  Nor is wearing the class ring two years out of high school.

Not a sermon, just a thought.

Sincerely,

Stewie Redrum, Esq.

  • Did he drive away in a white Trans Am?

    What the hell would a time-warp mullet guy be buying at Wawa anyway? Champale?

  • aricblue

    Screw you, dude–nobody can blaming him for wishing it was 1987.

    Now excuse me, I have to go put my parachute pants on and listen to either “I Want Your Sex” or “Livin’ On A Prayer”–it’s such a hard choice!

  • Mykl Gee

    Was it Bill?

  • Snooze

    I had no idea about the protocol of class ring wearing. I thought they were meant to be worn for life. It wasn’t something that anyone had where I went to school so I wouldn’t have realized his faux pas. I loved your description of it. You’re right that some people seem caught in a time warp.

  • I had a dragon on my class ring. I still hate my ex for ‘losing’ it when we broke up and at me for giving it to him in the first place. I can’t tell you if I’d still wear it or not.

    Was Mullet Man your neighbor? Oh, wait, they got him drunk and cut it off, didn’t they?

  • dorothygale

    Why are you hating on the mullet ? You know its all business in the front and party in the back !

  • Stewie, Stewie, Stewie. You must embrace your gayness, not shy from it. :shake:

    You mean to tell us that a mullet-sporting, class-ring wearing stud doesn’t do it for you? Even if it were 1987? I’m disappointed in your lack of courage.

    😆

  • Snooze

    Aw, I miss your posts. So I tagged you. :yay: